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Glastonbury 2017 – One Line Reviews

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Glastonbury 2017 was fantastic. I love the wear-what-you-like vibe, the bright flags, colourful bins, Brothers cider, weird stuff, amazing food, the giant fire and music blasting spider, and the fact it’s acceptable to wash down your breakfast with a gin. There is also some music going on. Here are my one line reviews of who we saw:

Glass Animals (Friday, BBC Introducing Stage) – Nice and chilled.

Blossoms (Friday, Pyramid Stage) – I’d prefer them if he cut his hair.

Declan McKenna (Friday, John Peel Stage) – Pleasant to sleep to.

George Ezra (Friday, Other Stage) – Good soundtrack to DIY henna tattoos.

Radiohead (Friday, Pyramid Stage) – Watched for 40 minutes and didn’t know any songs so went to the circus instead.

In Heaven (Saturday, John Peel Stage) – Background music to more henna tattoos.

The Amazons (Saturday, John Peel Stage) – Gave me an appetite to eat junk food.

Busted (Saturday, Avalon Stage) – Should have headlined Friday night.

Katy Perry (Saturday, Pyramid Stage) – Unexpectedly brilliant.

Birdy (Saturday, Avalon Stage) – Soundtrack to UV face painting.

Foo Fighters (Saturday, Pyramid Stage) – Awesome.

Dropkick Murphy (Sunday, Other Stage) – Fun but a bit screamy.

Rag ‘n’ Bone Man (Sunday, Other Stage) – Expected better but he’s only human.

Kodaline (Sunday, Other Stage) – Nice to relax with a gin to.

Haim (Sunday, Other Stage) – Pleasant to sleep off gin to.

Biffy Clyro (Sunday, Pyramid Stage) – Bifftastic.

Ed Sheeran (Sunday, Pyramid Stage) – Fun, jam packed Sunday sing-a-long.

 

 

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Eleven Things I Learned at Glastonbury 2015

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I’m not going to Glastonbury this year but here are my tips for those who are.

Sunflowers and Stories

They say you learn something new every day. Here are some things I learned at Glastonbury 2015:

  1. Baby wipes are your friend but they don’t taste very nice.
  2. Weather apps lie.
  3. Lionel Ritchie is, a) popular, and b) American.
  4. The stinky unwashed feeling eases after a few days.
  5. A pint of Brothers cider is cheaper than potato wedges.
  6. A bit of mud never harmed anyone.
  7. If a sign says don’t enter, do enter. Especially if a mud caked Irish man guards the entrance while hurling abuse in a friendly manner.
  8. Cardboard shewees are not to be trusted.
  9. Backwards is forwards, up is down, and fun is to be found in the rabbit hole.
  10. Holding an inflatable sperm high in the air while navigating the crowds is an effective way of keeping a group together.
  11. Glastonbury rocks!

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Just saying, Travel

Eleven Things I Learned at Glastonbury 2015

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They say you learn something new every day. Here are some things I learned at Glastonbury 2015:

  1. Baby wipes are your friend but they don’t taste very nice.
  2. Weather apps lie.
  3. Lionel Ritchie is, a) popular, and b) American.
  4. The stinky unwashed feeling eases after a few days.
  5. A pint of Brothers cider is cheaper than potato wedges.
  6. A bit of mud never harmed anyone.
  7. If a sign says don’t enter, do enter. Especially if a mud caked Irish man guards the entrance while hurling abuse in a friendly manner.
  8. Cardboard shewees are not to be trusted.
  9. Backwards is forwards, up is down, and fun is to be found in the rabbit hole.
  10. Holding an inflatable sperm high in the air while navigating the crowds is an effective way of keeping a group together.
  11. Glastonbury rocks!